So many changes and rambling thoughts

Blogging has taken a backseat in the past year, wow my last post was in March (so sad!!).  I didn't stop blogging on purpose, but our life and family have had a lot of big changes and after Wes turned 2 1/2 most of my journaling for him was complete.  Long gone are the days of the monthly updates, and while I still want to continue to journal their growth, big accomplishments and milestones, there was just too many other things happening.  The most exciting thing happened when I peed on a stick in January.  A positive test result.  One night (pre-pregnancy test) Tim and I were on the couch, and I felt some cramping.  I turned to him and said, if I am pregnant the egg just implanted itself into the uterus. Tim rolled his eyes.  But I knew that feeling was very special.  We  had only done the deed one time, so if I was pregnant, it would be a miracle, but I had hope.  We had been on the fence about having baby #3 for so long, we both just didn't know how to make the decision.  It was like we were overthinking it, and all the negatives and the positives were always so convincing and confusing.  It was by far the hardest thing to talk about emotionally.  One day we would feel one way, and other days it would be all I could think about. We fought over it, we cried over it. It was this never ending roller coaster.  In January, on a whim we both just decided to go for it one night without worrying about protection, and literarly from that point on the decision was made for us.  It FELT right. It FELT like it was meant to be.  I felt happiness.  I felt peaceful, and I felt complete.

And then another big change hit our family.  Tim got a new JOB.  After 12 years at his current company, he took a leap of faith and landed an amazing job an hour away.  This meant, MOVING.  So lets recap here: new baby, new job and now a new town??!!!

I think we handled it very well considering ALL these big changes were the BIGGEST life changes that could almost be thrown at anyone.  It's easy to look back on now and say we made it, but there were a lot of tears that came with everything.  We had to sell our house, deal with relocating, finding a new home to buy, all while trying to host open houses (potential buyers), first trimester exhausation, two little cutie pie hellions and Tim starting a new position at a new company.

As I sit and type this, it's almost as if all of it was a blur.  I know it happened, because I am sitting in our new home right now, but it is not without deep relflection that 2015 has definitely been our most challenging year. I am happy to report we have settled into our new life with much ease (and $$ spent lol), but it's all been worth it.

I also can't forget to mention we are also a mini van family now so yes, you can add new car to that mix.  Never say never!

Dear Weston - 2 1/2 years old

Dear Weston,
I wasn't sure how you would handle being 2, but you know what?  You are a dream.  A total dream 2 year old.  Here is what I say about you when people ask: He can do no wrong. I am so in love with you, it's crazy ridiculous, and the best part about these feelings is you are the most snuggliest, lovable, kissable little boy, who listens, who rarely throws tantrums, who is generally super happy most of the time, and is slowly acquiring your own independence.  You kiss me ALL day, you sit in my lap all the time.  You say things like "want to snuggle?"  and "I wuv you."  You sing songs with your sister, you play nicely with her most of the time, and you are a very happy well rounded boy. You love to make friends, you aren't afraid of people and you exude a very quiet confidence about you.  You excel in your vocabulary, you have 4-5 word sentences and you talk all the time.  I remember a time you didn't say too much, but now, you just repeat everything we say, soaking up every single word. You are excelling in your milestones and are very bright.  It's crazy to think how about how hard of a baby you were, but now you are silly, funny, and just this bright light in our family.  I cannot get enough of you, and I am with you all the time. 

I really love who you are becoming, and am so proud of you.

You are growing too, 50% for weight and 97% for height. You are still picky eater, but we stick to our eggs in the morning routine, you usually snack a few times a day (on yogurt raisins, cheese, chips, crackers, or popcorn) and then eat a good dinner (pizza, quesadillas, pasta and mac n cheese).  You LOVE your milk - and drink about 30 ounces a day.  We just started giving you a multi vitamin in a gummy bear form and so I hope that will fill in the gaps in your diet until you start getting more courageous in trying new things (because you are missing out!).

Sleep has been great. We transitioned you into a twin bed right at 2 1/2. You have fallen out once or twice, but you do great when you are in your room sleeping.  Usually our nights start off with book and then I will sit with you in your room until you fall asleep. Most of the time you prefer your bed to sleep, but occasionally you will fall asleep with me in your rocking chair and then I will move you.  Our biggest problem right now is keeping you in your bed ALL night, because both you and your sister eventually come into our bed in the middle of the night. We stopped your naps all together a little after 2.  It was taking you too long to fall asleep at night, so dropping your nap all together made the most sense to us.You do quiet time with Jillian and watch a movie and then you get 12 hours of sleep at night and are usually asleep within 10 minutes of your bedtime.

You were potty trained two months ago at 2 years 4 months.  We let you roam around the house naked most of the time, but it was the easiest potty training.  You have great bladder control, and responded well to praise and gummy treats. You still wear a diaper at night, but I am in no hurry to rush that, besides your diaper is usually dry in the morning anyways, so I am sure that will happen in the next few months.

Heres a list of things you LOVE:

1) Buzz Light year
2) Cars and Trucks
3) Still your favorite is your bruder garbage truck
4) You love the movie Bolt and the Minions
5) Your first movie was the Minions :)
6) You like to help me cook
7) You can sit patiently - I bring this up because as a younger sibling you are waiting on jillian a lot (dance, swim lessons, school, etc) and you can wait with me so well.
8) You LOVE to swim, you love to dunk under and will jump in from the side of the pool or diving board.
9) You love to jump, fight daddy, play swords and guns all those fun boy things.
10) You are obsessed with the lawnmower and will watch daddy mow the lawn in awe.
11) You like tools, we call them daddy tools.  You want to play with them all the time.
12) You say "yet" instead of "yes" when you are answering a question.  You used to say "mmmm hmmm" and both are irresistibly cute. 


I will add to this list as I remember things, but goodness, you are just a dream toddler.  Perfect in every single way and I just love seeing who you are becoming, because I am beaming with pride.  You are certainly going to be a great older brother when the baby arrives, because you have a huge heart.

Love,
Mommy

Dear Weston - 2 Years Old

Dear Wes,
It's really hard to believe that you are two.  It's really sad in a way that you are growing up, but I am so happy to say that you are flourishing in all areas as a two year old.  You are hilarious, you are sweet and sensitive, you have a kind heart, but most of all you are friendly.  You know ALL your letters and your ABC's, you know how to count to 10 and you can recognize each letter, and you LOVE your books more than anything.  While we see an extremely bright young boy, we also see a very tender, loving boy.  If you see mommy upset, you come up to me and hug me.  You say I "wub" you out of the blue.  You give us kisses whenever we ask (well most of the times, sometimes you do say no kisses and push our faces away), but there is never a shortage of hugs from you.  You love to dance. You love stuffed animals and giving them hugs and kisses. You are obsessed with cars and trucks, especially Mater (aka Matey) from Disney Cars.  When you get upset or angry, you pout your lips really big and say NO! You hate wearing pants, and will only wear shorts.  You have gone potty on the toilet a handful of times on your own doing.  You finally mastered the slide at the park, which for you took a while to gain confidence.  You could swing ALL day long.  Your vocabulary is advanced for a two year old. You form 3-4 word sentences and you talk all day long. This wasn't always the case, because I feel compelled to add that I was a bit worried that you didn't say much around 18 months.  This word explosion has been great in understanding what you want and need, but there are still times where we are confused which upsets you.  For a 2 year old toddler, you sure do know what you want.  You want to do things on your own, mostly copying your sister, but you get upset if you can't do them by yourself.  You are obsessed with mowing the lawn. You say it 100 times a day to daddy.  You are also obsessed with trash cans and the garbage truck.  Monday mornings are a highlight when we go to the curb and watch the garbage trucks come pick up our trash.  You yell, blue can, black can and green can. Which is also been helpful, because you are eager to help me take things out to the garbage!

You also love to help me cook.  Which is surprising because you are still a PICKY eater!  It drives me nuts. We had a red flag with your weight at your 2 year check up.  You went from 30% to 10% in weight.  The doctor was concerned.  He told us no more nursing! He also wanted to see us back in one month for a weight check.  So we stopped nursing cold turkey - sort of.  I continued to nurse you before nap and bed. It was a hard transition.  We had to say goodbye to the morning nursing session which was my favorite because it meant I carried you back to bed with me to nurse while I got extra time in bed and got snuggles from you.  In order to transition you from super cranky monster in the morning, we put on a short cartoon of Disney's cars. You loved it. You got milk in a sippy, and sort of forgot about nursing.  After naps were much easier, you didn't mind so much that we didn't nurse.  It was not an easy month, but after our return visit you had gained 2 pounds!!! You were back up to 30% and doctor was very happy.  In this month we started to see you eat so much more.  Eggs for breakfast every day with sausage, lots of mac n cheese and pastas, lots of rice and one of your favorite foods is chic filet chicken nuggets! Honestly I was relieved on so many levels.  While you still don't eat much through out the day, you are consistently eating at least one good  meal a day.  And we give you what you like. 

As far as nursing, we are down to just one time a day, right before nap.  I lay down with you in your room, let you nurse to sleep and then I get up and leave the room.  You give us solid 2-3 hour naps, and most of the time wake up happy, but honestly you are a cranky riser.  I think it's still because you miss the nursing, but I also think this will get better with maturity over time.  Nighttime has been a huge success on account of daddy.  He puts you to sleep, and personally I think you prefer it.  You two have created your own routine which is books, singing songs and then laying together until you slowly fall asleep.  You still cry a little when he leaves the room, but as daddy says, it's building confidence and over time this will only improve. 

We had a small birthday gathering for your big day.  Grandpa Curt and Grandma Mo were in town, and of course we invited over Dan and the Bielats.  We ordered pizza and had a custom cake made and you got lots of fun gifts.

A few other things I don't want to forget:
1) You like to role play and can play house with Jillian or princesses, or another favorite: the farm!
2) Your favorite toy is your bruder trash truck.  Every day all the time
3) You still call Jillian GiGi
4) You love playing at Jillian's school after we pick her up. You love the teeter toter and your favorite friend is Cayden (Riley's younger brother). Wow, you love him.
5) Another toy favorite: leggos!
6) Running running and running - you are speedy
7) Nick names: Wild wild west, Wes man, Wes bug and Jillian called you West

January 2015 - Quick Update

Life is really busy. I haven't had an update on the kiddos in while so lets get to this.

Jillian -

- We had a tea party themed 4th birthday. I let her invite 4 friends: Ellora, Ava, Riley and Haley. We had a face painter, balloon twister, crafts and some fancy tea time.
- You started school in September and also were invited to be on the company dance team called Rubber Duckies!
- You LOVE dress up.  All day every day.  And Frozen.  That pretty much sums it up!
- You can write your own name, you know your birthday, your street, your city, and best of all is you think you know EVERYTHING because "you are 4." Everything is "Because mom, I am 4."
- You sleep in our bed every night. Daddy got the boot to the couch (more on that later).
- When you are mad at Weston you say "Mom, can we throw him away?"
- When you are mad at me you say "Mom, I don't love you anymore"
- When you are needy you say "Mom, I just want to be with you" This means hold me or just snuggle me.
- You are such a great listener - truly. I never have to discipline you.  We reason and talk things out.  It works.
- You pick out your clothes every day. Mostly dresses and always long sleeves.  You are SO picky about what itches your skin and you STILL don't understand how to dress appropriately for the right weather.  Rain and cold does not mean sandals and tank top dresses.
- You rarely let me do your hair and brushing tangles out, forget about it. It's like torture.
- Amazing eater - you try it all, and eat SO healthy.  Like when we go out to dinner you will order a salad! Who are you??!!
- You love to dance, you bust moves all the time and your new favorite color is now pink. So long purple.
- Milo is still your favorite pet
- You are the BEST big sister - you play really well with Weston and you love to include him.

Weston
- You really like the word NO now.
- When you hear music (and are in the mood) you start to dance by moving your head.
- You even have a dance move called Sumo Legs....yep, Sumo Legs.
- You run, like full on run.  It's amazing to see how determined you always are.
- You are also picky when it comes to clothes. If you could, you'd be naked.  You resist the diaper, you can't stand pants, and you will only put on a shirt if it's Thomas the train or Disney's Cars.
- You talk ALL the time and repeat everything we say.
- When you get riled up and want to play with Jillian you go over to hear and start giving her little hits. Nothing agressive, just your way of physically telling her, come on lets wrestle or something!
- You haven't exactly gotten the hang of hide and seek yet (although you try)
- Singing and dancing, those things are your jam!
- Still a huge momma's boy and that thing called sleep is getting better.
- Nursing: yep, we call it "nee-nee" and you ask for it now.  Sometimes I can say no, but you are still heavily dependent on it.
- You aren't so much of a good listener....yet.  You throw tantrums, but we divert your attention when it happens.
- You call grandpa Bill "Bopa"


Life in General:
- We spent Christmas in Arizona with family and had an amazing time.
- You guys rocked the road trips to Arizona and to AG to to see Grandma and Bopa!
- Jillian went ice-skating with Grandma Marcia (first time and did awesome). As a special treat, Queen Elsa was there too!
- Went to disneyland with Lisa and Ava for a girls day.
- Got some family pictures done



And now for some pictures!

Dear Weston - 18 Months

Dear Wes man -
You are truly an amazing little guy.  Since our last update at 1 year there have been so many changes.  First and foremost you started sleeping in your own crib through the night at 14 months old.  We tried crying it out at 12 months but it didn't work.  We tried again at 13 months, you still weren't ready.  But at 14 months something just clicked and it worked.  It wasn't easy, you still cried, but you only cried for about 20 minutes the first time. It was less the second night.  And from that point on, you have been a really great sleeper. Don't get me wrong there are nights here and there that you wake up in the middle of night, but I let you cry it out.  At the longest this could be 20-25 minutes, sometimes only 10 minutes.  I also should mention I nurse you down before naps and bedtime.  These nursing sessions happen after a book, and can last up to 45 minutes.  Sometimes this is challenging if I have your sister I need to tend to, but mostly I enjoy this time with you because I get some alone/quiet time too.  Honesty, it's a time we get to snuggle, I get to hold you, and a time that I just smother you with little kisses while you eyes start to get heavy. Naps have also been great! Right now you are just napping once a day around 1 pm until about 3 pm (2-3 hours). Sometimes when we are out for a long time in the morning you will fall asleep in the car on the way home.  And you know what you have mastered?? You can transfer!! We can pick you up asleep from your car seat or stroller and move you to the crib.  It's amazing and has made my life SOOO much easier.

We've got such a great routine going on with you now that you have become a more independent little guy.  You wake up early, sometimes 6 am. I always bring you into bed with me and we nurse for 30-45 more minutes.  Then Jillian is up and we all go downstairs and have breakfast. We always leave the house and are usually back for lunch. Naps happen after lunch, and while you nap, Jillian and I have our own quiet time and we watch a movie. After nap, we have snack, play outside, head to the park, or grocery store, and most days we go for a walk.  Although once the weather in got too hot (August and September) we skip the walk and stay inside. I manage to cook most nights and once dad gets home we eat at 6/6:30.  We bathe you both every other night and then it's time for bed at 8 pm.

You are such a BOY.  You love cars.  You take them on the couch or the table and pretend they are driving on a street or race track.  You still love airplanes, but some new loves are play dough, crayons, dancing, exploring mine and daddy's cars, climbing on the couches and beds, and the sandbox.  If I had to pick the one thing you LOVE the most it would be books.  You could read/look at your books all day long.  You love to sit your bottom right into mine or daddy's lap and hand us a book.  Your favorites: Brown Bear Brown Bear, Any word books with pictures, Go Dogs Go, Goodnight Goodnight Construction Site, and Colors.  You are really smart.  You are a little reserved, shy at first, but it doesn't take you long to warm up.  Once comfortable you babble on and on.  You LOVE your sister.  You want to copy everything she does.  You are learning to hold your own with her as well.  She tends to take toys away from you, but now days you will scream back and her, telling her through your babbles to stop doing that!  You sleep with your blankie.  You haven't gotten attached to any sort of lovie. You sleep with a white noise machine.  You are still a terrible eater.  We've been able to figure you what you like and just stick to those.  You are a texture eater. So anything soft, squishy, or slimy you won't touch.  Which means all fruit is out.  You enjoy cheese, all crackers, raisins, or yogurt raisins, chips, sweets, ice cream, pizza, all pasta, broccoli, donuts, chicken, meat, quesadilla's and cereal.  Oh and you LOVE milk.  I try not to stress about your diet.  My only concern is if you are getting bigger and you are.  You jumped up to 35% for both height and weight.  You are still a little guy on the skinny side, but you have a lot more hair and your eyes are still bright blue.

You have a lot of words! A lot of things are referred to as Da Da, but besides me and Jillian, you just adore your daddy.  He calls you little champion and it's your nickname.  I call you Bubbs or Bubbies and mostly Wes. You respond to all. You say mama, doggy, cow, car, ding dong, A version of "I want that," cat, ball, bubbles, purple, apple, and so many more....You still point and grunt when you want something too, but you are such a sweet little guy.  You are SOOOOO still suggly!! Way more than your sister.  You will be playing and out of the blue you will come right up to me and give me a hug and a kiss.  Actually anytime we ask you for a kiss you open your mouth and go right for our cheeks.  You think about things before you do them and for your age, you are an extremely good listener.  You know so many phrases and will obey me even if I am not there. You know not to climb the stairs and you will wait at the bottom until you see me to start your way up...You are just so sweet.  You do hit when you get mad.  You will hit me or Jillian or just hit other things.  And you do throw tantrums, but they aren't very long.  You are stubborn for sure.  I have known that since you were a baby, but you act out if you don't get something you want.  Sharing is hard for you, but I don't blame you. It's hard when Jillian is always taking things from you, so recently you have started to get really mad at her and hit her.  One thing about you is you know when I raise my voice, you have done something wrong. You cry and get really upset but it's a sweet cry.  You come to me and fall into  my arms and just want to nurse.  You use me as a pacifer, and there are sometimes you are on the boob all day.  I usually don't mind, since nursing acts as a reset button.  If you are upset, angry, or hurt you can nurse for a bit and once you are done, you are back to a happy little guy. I have good days and bad days with nursing.  I know you still need it, but sometimes it's very time consuming.  It's hard on Jillian to understand why so much of my time is with you - it's something I am trying to find balance in.

You have had a busy summer.  Beach trips weekly, play dates, lots of pool time. You enjoy the water but in small doses.  The beach is better with you since you LOVE the sand.  Your friends are still Jillian's friends.  But you are social.  You are always sharing toys in the sandbox with other kids and are always curious about the little boys you see running around at the parks and beach. I really love your personality and what I see forming.  While your stubborness can be front and center sometimes, you are a smart, kind little boy.  You crave warmth, and love, and you enjoy sharing and meeting others. This is how I imagine your dad was as a little one.  It's a joy seeing you thrive!!

I have said this before but you have made our family feel complete.  You are so incredibly perfect and have come a long way.  I love you so much, and feel blessed I have been able to care for you since you were born.  I've gotten to personally see all your milestones and my connection with you feels incredibly magical.  From nursing to all the snuggles, you are such a dream. Love you always Wes man.

Love
Mama

Below is a little list of things I don't want to forget.

- Went to Santa Barbara for a few nights and you fell off a chair and hurt your head.  
- Went to Grandma Marcia's and Grandpa Bill's house for two weeks in the summer. You feed goats and horses
- Went to Palm Springs for our annual trip to the Marriott Vacation Club.  BEST WEEK EVER!!  You chased ducks, went swimming every day and ate your first popciscle.